When we have been hurt in the past it’s only natural for us to try protecting our hearts from feeling that pain again.
That pain might have been all-consuming, it might have felt so heavy that you thought you would never get out of those heavy emotions. It can take you to a pretty dark place.
We become angry with the person who caused us pain, whether that be a partner or in a career, but especially in relationships.
Then we become upset with ourselves. We should have known better; we should have seen the signs. We could have done this and could have done that.
We allow our minds to enter the abyss of negative emotions regarding that pain.
But after darkness comes light, we move on because that’s what happens. Life goes on and so do we.
Time heals all wounds……… right? Not necessarily.
If you have not dealt with that pain healthily then your heart tells your mind, “Pain is way too scary can you please protect me”. Now you enter relationships with trust issues and your defense up. The mind wants to protect the heart.
If our trust was damaged in the context of a romantic relationship then we may be prone to struggle with trusting our choices in future partners.
The fear of being abandoned, rejected, embarrassed, and ashamed can lead to fears of vulnerability.
Trust can be a challenging energy to connect with, especially when you’re stuck in a space of underlying chronic fear.
If we want to be able to trust others, we need first, to have confidence in our ability to take care of ourselves.
The Root Cause of lack of self-trust & How to Trust Again
It goes back to childhood and what we were taught regarding healthy coping skills and self-confidence.
If you were raised in a household where you were blamed and shamed for making mistakes, it’s only natural for you to blame yourself for making the mistakes that caused the pain.
If you were also raised in a household where your feelings and emotions were not acknowledged, then as an adult it will be challenging to regulate your emotions since yours weren’t acknowledged as a child.
These factors can contribute to how you can manage emotional pain in your adult life.
To regain back the self-trust, you need to become aware of your fears.
What are your fears telling you? Because usually, your fear tells you the story that the heart is holding onto.
Once you are aware of your fear this is when you can start the healing process of your heart. You can open yourself to love, and trust that you can make it through any pain life brings to you.
This life is filled with beautiful moments and painful moments as well, but that’s all part of the process of experiencing life. It is the stories we attach to these experiences which cause us the most suffering.
But we are here in this life to experience and learn from our experiences, so we shouldn’t try to control our experiences by living in our fears. We end up hindering ourselves, and our soul’s growth. Here are some tips to reconnect with yourself and get back to trusting.
Reconnect with yourself.
Learning to trust ourselves begins with self-awareness.
If we want to be able to trust others, we need first, to have confidence in our ability to take care of ourselves.
Take a moment to practice mindfulness and learn to discover your needs. Journaling your thoughts is a great way to get introspection into your subconscious mind.
Knowing how to fulfill your needs is essential when you are dealing with highly emotionally intense situations.
Self-awareness can also help gain clarity on the situation; you can get caught up in your feelings during painful moments and not see the situation as clearly.
Forgiveness for yourself is a great way to also begin to self-trust and trust others. When you forgive yourself for any of the mistakes you made in the past, you can give yourself grace and understanding that we are all human. We are all trying our best, there is no blueprint for our particular life we just have to go with the flow.
Meditation on the Heart Chakra
When our heart chakra is out of balance it is believed to cause anger, lack of trust, anxiety, jealousy, fear, and moodiness.
When your heart is open it is linked to compassion, trust, passion, and love for self and others.
Practice this beautiful heart-opening meditation to open your heart.
Conclusion
Within the complexity of human connections and relationships self-trust is the first step to the powerful symphony of trust in others.
By believing in ourselves, embracing self-compassion, and nurturing our self-esteem, we lay a solid foundation for the bonds we form with those around us.
As we take these steps, we open ourselves to the transformative power of trust, allowing us to connect deeply, communicate openly, and build lasting relationships.
So, remember, the path to trusting others begins within; nurture your self-trust, and watch as it blossoms into the beautiful garden of trust in the world.
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